October 4, 2016The Lord be your only light in this dark world, Heartdwellers.
I'm going to share a conversation I had with one of our Heartdwellers in NYC. Her journey has been short, but extremely intense and the Lord is saying the same thing to her that He has said to us. Namely, He is calling us higher.
There is a group of us on this channel that wants everything God has for them. "Blessed are they who hunger and thirst after righteousness, they shall be filled." (That's in the Beatitudes: Matt. 5:6) God has saved us, and if we abide in His grace, we will go to Heaven.
But some of us are still dying of thirst and want more, more, more of Him. He is making an invitation known.
Here's that conversation.
I missed recording the very first part of what she was sharing, it had to do with "walking on egg shells". She, too, was over compensating to please the Lord. And that was the message yesterday.
Friend: ...eggshells around the Lord, that's what I was doing, 'cause I didn't know what to do. So, He's been making it much easier for me to realize that, it's not always acts, it's the way it's done. It's the respect in my heart. Sometimes, He got relegated...you know, again, the list got longer and He got relegated to when I was free to just spend all that time. And before you knew it, it was less.
Clare: Let me ask you something. Did you listen to the message?
Friend: Well, funny, I listened to that afterwards...
Clare: What a confirmation!
Friend: Yeah. And it's exactly the last...I was listening to Him after, and I thought 'Oh, I'd better talk to Him first.' So, I didn't do that, and I heard these two after, and I just started laughing. Because it's something that you'll need to discuss with the Heartdwellers.
One and all, He's calling us to new levels with Him. And as you said, it doesn't mean starvation and poverty, it doesn't, you know - it is what it is for each person. But, it was impressed on my heart that as He calls each of us to closer and closer intimacy, there are sacrifices and there are wonderful rewards. And they're different for everybody. Everybody's walk is different. But He is calling now. Because He's been saying, remember, "there's something just around the corner, just around the corner" - it's on my heart that this is to help protect us. That if we'll cleave to Him, and if we're glued to Him, they can't mess with us.
But He said again, it's always free will, there's always free will. So, He offers, but He said not everybody will accept and that He wants our whole hearts. That He doesn't want part of a heart, He really wants ALL of us. And again, that's different for everybody.
If we don't know how to do that - ASK. Ask for help, this giving up you, yourself to Him. ALL of us. That's... He's calling all of us to newer levels. And with that comes greater intimacy, greater joy and greater sacrifice of something. But that could be... suffering... that could be monetary. It could be saying 'no' to your favorite chocolate. I mean, it's different for everybody, but it's about Obedience and Offering.
It's really the next step in all of us, actually. He says whenever we think we've gotten TO the level, there's never an end to that. We get used to something, we actually develop habits in something and then He calls us to the next level. And there's always a next level for all of us. Certainly until we get to Heaven, and I think there - afterwards. There's just going to be continued growth, closer and closer.
But now is the time. And this was a "catch attention" and let everybody know: it's much more than that - it's about giving heart, about literally being obedient when...
I was struggling (the other day), I was really thirsty and I finally realized... The one thing I really didn't want to do is buy water! I'm so offended by that, I skip buying water. And yet, everything else was full of chemicals, so He really wanted me to buy the water. I had to get something and I thought, 'Well, okay, then it's water! I don't want to do it, but I'm gonna do it.' I walked right past the licorice, which is like a "thing" for me and...I'm not stopping, I saw it on display. 'I'm gonna ask You for help because we know that I want to eat the whole bag right now.' And so, you know, it's for me? It's about dying to my flesh, about not giving in. And I think to some degree, that's all of us.
It's also about giving our hearts to Him. I think it's very much like partial obedience is NOT obedience. He wants a whole heart. It's kind of a really all or...I didn't realize, it's very all or nothing. And as long as we're moving in that direction, that's fine. But I think a lot of folks, including me I'm sure, have gotten it in our heads that, "Oh, THIS is the place to stay! Yeah, I'll stay here!" And there's a comfort level - we know what's happening. Whereas in His way, it's a surprise every minute of every day, because you don't really know where He's taking you. You're gonna accept that, if it's Him, on faith... this is something that if you don't like, it's gonna help you and ultimately will be better for you, and will bring you closer to Him.
You know there's great joy in that. Truly, it's inexplicable.
Clare: Yeah, yeah - absolutely.
Friend: I have no words... And I think some people understand that, and some people yet do not, because He's calling them, again, to the next level and I don't know if a lot...actually, it's on my heart that a lot of folks don't really know that it just keeps going. You know? That it keeps evolving. But that with each level comes sacrifice, according to what His plan is for you, and difficulty along with the positive. So that, it is a struggle and it doesn't need to be financial for some, it could be - you know, "I have to keep my weight under control", or "He wants me healthier because my blood sugar stinks". Or, like me, don't eat that garbage; you can't make My body, My temple live on licorice. You know, it's kinda true...
So, whatever it is... And offerings. The other thing was offerings. And I'm not saying to everybody... just like you're saying - Don't live in poverty - you know, this is MY walk. This is mine.
But He wants us to offer all of us. And I think, it's on my heart, that this is for Trump's protection and push. 'Cause He wants Trump/Cyrus in the White House, that's IT. But He also needs stuff to work with. If enough of us aren't praying and giving, and watching over - then, you know. He's not gonna do it. He wants to see that we're in it and with Him the whole way. And I think the reason we're being told is because there are several that have been here for a while - I'm not talking somebody who's just popped in there once to the channel. But who've been there, who hear the messages and is calling them to make a choice. With Me and we go? or Not with Me.
I hate to say that, but that's really what He wants. He wants them to know that there's more, that even at this level there's a fence-sitting, like "Oh, that part looks hard, I'm not gonna do that - but I'm good where I am!" And He's saying, "The walk doesn't stop. You gotta keep doing that." And that's what He wants several to make that decision and to know - even if they don't know what it is, just have faith that He's not gonna make... You know, He doesn't want them a mess, He doesn't want them cracked up and miserable! He wants them joyous, happy and free! They just don't understand, like I don't understand what will bring me joy and happiness.
Friend: That's what I was taught.
Clare: You and your licorice... When I woke up from my nap, I thought, 'You know, chocolate always works for me.' The only thing that got me out of bed was the taste of that nice Ghirardelli chocolate on my tongue, right? And the energy I get from it. And I get up and I think to myself, 'What if He doesn't want me to have chocolate?'
Friend: That's' the idea, yeah.
Clare: Because He wouldn't let me have it the other night. So, I just started pushing it away and didn't even bother to ask Him, you know. I'm just not doing it.
Friend: Oh, I'll be He loved that!
(end of discussion)
Well, Lord, You kept me out of the chocolate, that was a miracle. I was having the worst craving to the point of being angry. Then I asked Him to take the desire away and somehow I was given the grace to just keep on going, right by it.
And when I wrote this down, I heard Him say over my shoulder, "More to come!" That's wonderful news. He's gonna help me give up some things that really have had me in a bondage, of sorts.
"You look at someone like Heidi Baker...she has quite a bit of Me. Do you want that much?
"Do you want more but are happy where you've settled? Do you know that there is no such thing as 'settling' where you are just maintaining? Decay, sloth and lukewarmness settle in on top of the place where you say 'thus far and no further.'
"Shall I lie to you and tell you there are no risks to staying at the level you are at? Yes, there are risks, serious ones. Not the least of which is that you will get sick to death of your complacency. You will feel as though you are hugging an empty shell when you hug Me, because I went on and you stayed at that old familiar, predictable, manageable level."
This truly is disclosing the struggle of my heart, even the long life struggle. I finally make it to a level where I can cope and now You want me to move on.
"Now you are looking at all the hurtles. I already have a provision for the hurtles: Look at Me.
"Those who do not make this commitment are going to run into deep trouble as the world disintegrates. What has not been given, what has not been offered, will simply be taken. But make a note of it, there is one thing they can't take from you...Me. They cannot take Me away from you unless you grow bitter from losses. That's their plan by the way, turn Christians bitter. They will be asking, 'Where's the good life, the abundant life He promised you?' And the enemy will provide the answer, 'With the One World Religion. There you will have an abundance of all you need.'
"Oh, yes, prosperity Christians are being set up and have been set up for what will inevitably take place. 'Where is that land of milk and honey? This land is full of thorns and briars?' And the enemy will point you in his direction with all the frills.
"The REAL Jesus will become out dated and passé."
I find it remarkable that One such as God is actually inviting us all to excellence and total commitment as Christians. He knows what it's going to take to get us to follow Him. He knows how backwards, fleshly and strong-willed we are. He knows that no one would blame you for drawing the line, 'thus far and no further.'
I remember trying to find a man to apprentice my son in carpentry. It was impossible; people don't think that way anymore. They are in it for themselves and not interested in expending time on someone who might someday be a competitor and put them out of business.
And here we have the Lord of Lords and King of Kings, inviting us to apprentice in holiness with Him. He has tailored all the lessons that each individual needs, He is providing all the materials, all the tutoring - everything. And I stand before Him with my finger in my mouth saying..."Lord, I don't think I can take anymore suffering."
Just last night I told Ezekiel, "I don't want any more suffering; this is enough. I want things to go well and not have challenges thrown at me everyday when I've hardly recovered from the last set of disasters. I like where I'm at, I don't want any more suffering. Please, Lord, no more. Please."
And that's what I told Ezekiel last night.
And you know? He will answer that prayer. If you mean it. If you are convinced, He will leave you behind at the level you're at and keep going with those Brides who were willing, who wanted more of Him. They may be headed for huge trials, but they have the huge consolation: happiness with Jesus. And a sense of fulfillment that you just don't get unless you're really, really working with Him on the level HE wants you to work at.
If I look back on my life ten years ago and ask myself if I am willing to move on with Jesus, I said, "Yes." And we moved on. And now we are here. But looking back on all the hard things that have happened, there are twinges of pain in my heart, but He made it all bearable, and we got through it. That's the point. If you look forward and calculate all the things you think you might have to give up, it looks like a mountain too steep to climb.
But if I keep my eyes on Jesus, and the smile on His face, the warmth of His embrace and happiness with me, and the souls that have come to Him because of what He's done through me. I would have to say, "Well, that wasn't so bad."
Why? Because He carried me. Stair-steps to Heaven are close enough together that even a toddler could climb them. So, even though the mountaintop pierces the clouds, one step at a time is doable. And that's where we come to His Mercy and Grace. He makes the way possible by scaling it to our ability, with His grace. You don't give a freshman in high school a test in advanced calculus. Rather, you create a test that his ability can handle. Something he's learned and applied, not something out of his grasp.
And so, our Lord is inviting us into His classroom and lab to learn and apply. Learn and apply. And He's the One teaching the course, and His Spirit is the One helping us absorb and practice it.
Does it sound like I'm trying to talk myself into following Him all the way? Well, if you've picked up on that, you're absolutely right. I'm looking at my skid marks and the times when I've planted my feet and said, "No." I'm ashamed of those times.
If we have fallen in love with Jesus, how can we stand to see Him walking over the horizon with a group of souls who wanted Him more than anything in the world. How do we wave goodbye to Him?
So, what is it that would cause us to go with Him in this unpredictable journey full of trials and challenges we never thought we could handle? Very simply: the reward is Him. His peace. Knowing that we have given our lives to Him 100% and we are not holding anything back. He has opened His heart and covered us with His love, revealed Himself more and more to us as we gave up more and more of the world. As we emptied ourselves of the world and the flesh, He filled us with Himself.
How truly glorious and sublime!
And He is so very grateful. He has empowered us for ministries we only dreamt of before. He has spent time with us tenderly sharing the most profound feelings of His heart, His dreams and hopes. And that beautiful expression in His eyes. He has revealed wonders to us and opened doors we thought were just for others to walk through. He has done mighty things through us, yet we feel smaller than ever before. Because we know He did it and we just gave Him our all, so He could.
Taking a short track back to Sinai, we find that the other group of souls, larger than ours, that opted to stay...they are still living in the desert, but find joy in worship and their labors. Yet beneath their smiles is a twinge of conscience, "I could have had so much more."
I pulled a Rhema yesterday that said, "If we don't mortify our passions, we will suffer constant remorse and fear." Oh, how true that is. With every little compromise with the flesh, our spirit sinks a little deeper beneath it. What would it be like to never have remorse or fear? To be operating at the very cutting edge of our skill level, according to the grace given us and have more of His Spirit than we ever dreamt possible?
We have only one life to live. I really don't want to leave this Earth behind with a whimper. I want a shout of gladness amidst a crowd of angels ascending into Heaven. But I must commit to surrendering my entire self.
Dear Lord, help me!
This truly is what I want. And when we get to the top of this mountain range we will see there's another and another and another. And it's not about conquering the mountain, but living our lives fully in Jesus and with Jesus - through Jesus. Abiding in the Vine.
It's the journey and it is hard and it is glorious. Will I follow Him withholding nothing? As Heidi Baker says, "a laid down lover for Jesus?" Only time will tell. But that is where I've set my sights. Jesus, I want to be with You to the very end. Please help me to trust that You will indeed carry me as You always have.