Friday, August 26, 2016

When Giving Up Is Not An Option/Part 1/Interview w Ezekiel

August 23, 2016
Clare: Well, Heartdwellers, a lot of you have been praying for Ezekiel because he's been sick. He's had kind of a bout with his stomach and intestines - it's been really hard. Especially our prayer warrior team has been praying fervently for him. And a really amazing thing took place last night. We wanted to share it with you, because it just highlights the awesome power of God.

You want to tell us what happened?

Ezekiel: Sure. A lot of you, as Clare has said, have been praying for me, fervently - and I'm overwhelmed at the letters and cards and emails from the heart, from the soul, from the spirit. The STRONG, strong words that you guys have spoken over me. I mean, it's so amazing when you write and then Holy Spirit starts praying through you.

Clare: Giving you a blessing...

Ezekiel: Oh, my gosh!

Clare: It's beautiful!

Ezekiel: What you speak, He incarnates, I gotta tell you - I'm living proof. Well... He spoke the Word and the Universe was created, so...

Clare: Tremendously powerful.

Ezekiel: When these abdominal seizures would begin to happen - and I'm not talking about here and there. I'm talking about every day, every night for hours on end. And I'd get some relief in between, but it was like, oh, my Lord - it was over 5 1/2 weeks at least this last bout.

And you're watching two people that you really...that you love more than anything in the world. You're watching the Lord and you're watching, if you're blessed to have a helpmate/heartmate in your're watching them. Some of you understand what that's like. And it's killing you. In your heart and mind and soul, it's killing you to see that it's killing them slowly. Something's attacking YOUR body and you just see them, somehow - by the grace of God - get up again and again and again. And keep going and keep praying and keep smiling. And they're there for every single detail that the Lord wants, that you need - and anything or anyone else.

So, I gotta tell you that right off the bat. This 5 1/2 week period led up to a, I guess a topping off point, a crisis point. It really came to a head yesterday.

I've walked with the Lord for some 30 years. I've come very close to the "crossing over" 3 times. Well, yesterday was number 3. And I've gotta tell you - it wasn't pretty. It was the hardest thing I think I've ever, ever been through. I just can't describe what it was like. And I kept thinking, 'Lord! I wanted this to be a time of celebration, a beautiful time. Something's not right in the water, here. Something's not right - there's darkness. There's turmoil. There's no peace.'

And my poor wife is just exhausted. I mean, we're talking about, as of yesterday, we were running on about 28 hours at that point.

And so, I went to my Scriptures, asked for some kind of guidance. I've turned up Scriptures on Death many times. But usually, it's always before or after something about our enemies, or this thing or that thing. THIS time it was sandwiched smack in the middle of Eternal Life - you know, how it's gonna be when we're in Heaven. Here's Death, right in the middle, all these Scriptures about how we're destined to die at some point... Unless! We're caught up in the Rapture. And He's going to raise us up on the last Day anyway. The third reading as we recall, because I was so in and out of it, readings, Scripture readings were all about the Holy Spirit - "I've told you these things that you might have joy."

Clare: You were using the Bible Promises.

Ezekiel: At that point, yes. The Bible Promises is...I know there've been a lot of critics, but it's just pure Scripture from cover to cover. And it's...sometimes you need "a word in season," you know? People used to make fun of "flip for a Script" or "Bible roulette" - open a Bible... badoom! Well...the Lord SPEAKS through His Word. And whether it's your large family Bible, or your church Bible, or whatever - Scripture is Scripture.
Clare: So, tell us what happened.

Ezekiel: So, the third Scripture was confirming that "this is the Holy Spirit". And I haven't heard - I haven't been able to hear from the Lord. I've been able to sense Him, oh, months. It's been a LONG, dry period. And I know a lot of you have been praying for a breakthrough with my music. It's been over a year since some of the songs He gave me...

Clare: So, the readings were very convincing that you might be dying, right?

Ezekiel: Yeah.

Clare: The Lord had been kinda quiet. You have the added cross of hearing the demonic dimension very, very clearly, most of the time. Tremendous amount of lying spirits, discouragement, condemnation - trying to cause fear and that kind of thing. So, you're real familiar with that and the Lord once told me that's one of your crosses.

Ezekiel: Oh, yeah..

Clare: And then when He breaks through and you start hearing HIM, it's like He gives you a respite from all that, and you have this wonderful time of really clear communication with Him.

Ezekiel: Right. Right.

Clare: So, this was still in a time of darkness.

Ezekiel: Yeah. I mean, we're just going back a few hours to yesterday evening, getting into the early hours of this morning. I heard the Lord clearly, and He said, "You have a choice. You can get up and walk out of this bed. Or...I love you, but I'm gonna have to bring you Home. I can't use you, I can't use you like this." And I thought, 'What?? Well, what about all the suffering, and those behind...?' He wasn't talking about that.

So, I got a little suspicious about the Scripture readings I'd been getting, you know? I thought, 'I'm gonna do a little tie-breaker thing here, so to speak.' And I went to the Scriptures a fourth time and got Laziness.

Clare: oooooh...ouch!

Ezekiel: Ooooh... I thought, "Uh oh! Wow! Lord, I'm laying here basically almost Cheyne-Stokes breathing, the last breathing that you have, when you only take a breath every two or three minutes, sometimes. I felt like not a drop was left of anything in my body - heart, mind, spirit, soul - you name it. And I said, "You're asking me...You're telling me that I'm LAZY?" I mean, I repent! And I know I have been at times, but... My God! Where's Your mercy?!"

And it was as if He said, "This IS My mercy. This is My mercy. I won't breech your will, I won't cross your will. But I love you enough, and I love souls enough that I'll bend your will. I'll push your will. I might even "scare" your will. But I WILL have My way in your life, if you'll let Me."

I started to get Scriptures about Faith at that point. So, my spirits started to lift. But I'm telling you, guys - I have never been closer to death in my life, except those NDE's, crossing over. And this was not a nice, happy thing. And all of a sudden I felt like I was under correction - I didn't understand.

And I just said, "Lord, I'm in the deepest, deepest pit. I'm at the bottom of the well. I don't...there's nothing left! I don't have anything. If anything happens, it's gotta be You. There's just not a gram or shred of any....I CAN'T!"

Clare: You mean getting out of bed.

Ezekiel: Right!

Clare: You didn't have any strength to get out of bed.

Ezekiel: And then I remembered: confession is good for the soul. We need to confess our sins to one another. This past week it had gotten so ...and you know. I know that you know what I'm talking about. So many of you guys. I got to the point where I said, "I can't do this anymore, Lord. Take the mansion You've shown me, everything You've promised - please don't send me to Hell...but, give me a little corner shack in the WAY far reaches of anything...but I can't do this anymore. I just can't."

Clare: You mean the pain, every day. Every time you eat...yeah. The pain was just terrible. Ice packs every night.

Ezekiel: Every day, every night. If you get up at all, you know. And I can't describe all that - but you all have IV's, and ...well, not all of you. But many of you have those kind of things. You've been bed-ridden...trying to give you some hope, here.

Clare: We didn't really talk about why...about how, day after day, you just couldn't work. I mean, you'd come in and look at your equipment...and people were praying that you could do some music. But it was like you were avoiding it. And then, when you did try it, to work on it, then you had pain because your guitar was in the place where your stomach was sensitive. But there were a few days in there where you just didn't have the will to carry on, really.

Ezekiel: Right.

Clare: You know. And you were really balking, and I think that's why the Lord brought you to this point where you're either going to get out of bed or I'm going to take you Home, because you're not - you're not doing what you're supposed to be doing.

And He corrected me the same night.

Ezekiel: All, exactly at the same time!

Clare: ...exactly at the same time - yeah. And my correction was - which I shared with you guys yesterday, in yesterday's message. My correction was that He wants a message out every night. He wants more.

Ezekiel: And this was a loving correction. I mean, you guys that know the Lord, you know Him.

I'm telling you, I was RIGHT THERE. amazing thing happened! I found myself up on one elbow and turning...and slipping out of the bed. And...on my feet. Well, it's not all flowers and roses yet, because there's still no strength...just enough... It's like, He gives you just enough for the next move. Just enough for the next step of faith. I tried to take a step, and I basically kinda caught myself on my elbows on the side of the bed. Had my head down...and one of our poor little kitties, Gracie, she was sound asleep. She woke up, she looked so worried! I mean, the cats were so clingy, like they knew. And the puppy...everything. So, I'm standing there, holding myself on my elbows, and somehow get a breath, a deep breath and push myself back up. That probably happened three times. It took me, easily, about 10 minutes to get from that bed to my room, where I have a little prayer altar, and my sound equipment, recording console, instruments, that kind of thing. Just one room away. 10 minutes.

Walked through the kitchen - for some odd reason, Clare decided a couple days ago to make a BIG batch of Kaniwa, or Quinoa - however you pronounce it. What's - it an old Aztec grain or something?

Clare: Yeah, it's high in protein and I creamed it, because you can't have anything that has little tails on it, like that does when you cook it. I creamed it and put a little sugar and a little almond extract and a little...that's about it. And blended it. Oh, a little coconut milk, I think. And blended that. It makes a wonderful drink. You can drink it hot or cold, it's very, very nourishing. Well, I made that...

Ezekiel: All I can tell you is, this is like a recipe straight from Heaven. The Lord sent...she hasn't made that for years.

So, that was there and I had a little bit of that. I'm talking about 2 or 3 little sips... and a little sip of fruit juice. And I felt stronger.
Clare: Well, so much for part one, guys. Tomorrow we'll have part two - and maybe part three! So stay tuned. The Lord bless you.

Source: heartdwellers